True Stories: Eight men on what they don’t understand the most about women
They say men are from Mars and women are from Venus, and the perceived difference between the two sexes has been endlessly rehashed in popular culture. While we can’t generalize behavior and pin it based on someone’s biological makeup, we wanted to know what the men we know often found most confusing about women. We hope this discussion helps forward our grasp on relationships with the other sex, and gives us some insight on what men usually notice about us.
Seph Cham, in a relationship
I don't understand when women say they are fine but they're actually not. I always argue with my mom and my two sisters because of this. Luckily, my girlfriend doesn't have this trait!
Masaru and RG
Masaru Nakaegawa, single
I once went shopping for clothes with a girl. The first thing that I liked and looked good on me, I brought to the counter and paid for. It was a fast decision with no doubts. She, however, wanted to check out all the stalls and shops! The worst part was that she still came out empty handed due to indecision while I had worn out my feet in trying to keep up. I think it may have stemmed from a strong insecurity about how she looked physically. I find that girls sometimes overthink and get anxious over what others would say on how they look.
RG Gabunada, married
I don't understand how complex and admirable women are as individuals. They are able to juggle a lot of things all at the same time while keeping their cool and their tasks organized.
Elijah and Ron
Elijah Legaspi, single
I grew up in an environment surrounded by women, and most of my friends are female so I actually had to do a lot of thinking about this. Most of the women I know don't seem to realize that they don't have to look like the prettiest and sexiest girl just to be able to catch the attention of a potential partner. Many girls are following the same trend: on fleek eyebrows, lip kits, skimpy outfits, skinny bodies. I have nothing against those trends if you believe it boosts your confidence but if you’re doing it to fit in, it can make you look generic and lose your uniqueness. You don't have to undergo all of these troubles just to catch a guy’s attention if that’s what you’re after - we're not worth it! And ladies, please, stop chasing after jerks. There are a lot of good guys out there.
Ron Alegre, single
Why do they have to keep so many kikay stuff? What is it with their monthly period? Why is it easy for some of them to get easily attached to men? Why do they take so many selfies? I don’t get the long hours they spend in malls just to pick a single dress and a pair of shoes. They spend so much time in salons and always have to ask if they look fat. There’s a lot I don’t understand about women!
Brian and Carlo
Brian Poe Llamanzares, dating
I’ll never understand why girls expect guys to be mind readers sometimes. Like when a girl says it’s fine, it’s never really fine.
Carlo Clemente, single
Some (if not most) women I know are walking, breathing riddles. When they want something, they won't say what it is. When made to choose, they'd simply say "okay," or "any," but then expect the other person to know that they don't really mean it. When this doesn't happen, they get angry. Some would immediately throw a fit, while some would suffer silently, and then bring it up - bring it ALL up - when a major confrontation erupts later. ¿Que pasa? Women would say they are over it and then blame you months or even years later.
Javie Bengzon, married
I will preface this by saying I don't feel comfortable making generalizations about people based simply on their gender. I don't think there are such things as gendered behaviors; gender may inform behavior, certainly, and it usually does, but to make a blanket statement regarding half of society and ascribing some universal behavior to that half seems reductive and incomplete. What, then, would my answer be to the question “What don't you understand about women”?
It would definitely have to be something that applies, as universally as possible, to all women, for the reasons mentioned above, and this is what I've come up with. It is completely inexplicable to me how, in the face of crippling injustice and mistreatment from society, religion, family, work, and other cultural factors, women seem to still be able to function, survive, and build lives for themselves that are nothing short of miraculous. Women continue to go to work despite getting paid 20% less than men for the same volume of work. Women are never permitted to explore or articulate their own sexuality, but when men do it, it's written off as “locker room talk”. Men can be priests, but women can't. Many other religions exhibit this same exclusion of women from their clergy, not just Catholicism. Being thrust into similar social imbalances would have many men reaching for their assault rifles.
As a woman, how does this apply to you? How do you address your differences with the men in your life? Let’s keep the discussion friendly!
Header image via RG Gabunada's Instagram account
