No boyfriend needed: 11 women on how to be single AND happy on Valentine's Day

With love songs playing everywhere and girls proudly showing off bouquets, it might easy to feel a little left out on Valentine's Day. As an “NBSB” (no boyfriend since birth), I know that I do. Still, over my twenty-odd years of flying solo, I’ve learned it’s best not to listen to those “single blues!” Instead, fill your mind with words of wisdom from these fabulously independent women who'll show you how to celebrate love even if you aren’t necessarily in love!

Tip #1: Date yourself

Mitzi, 35, finance controller

I’ve been single for three years now so I treat Valentine’s Day like any other ordinary day. Since my last failed relationship, I’ve learned how to give myself more respect and attention and be independent.

It’s so surprising to discover that I am still able to enjoy activities, which I’ve only been used to doing with a partner, by myself like traveling, eating out and watching movies. True, February 14 is just another day for me... but that’s only because I make sure to “date” myself on a regular basis!

Gen-zel, 27, makeup artist/Youtuber/musician

This Valentine's day, I want to have a pampering treat for myself and my dog, Chuchai, same as last year. I'm planning to book a staycation in a hotel, go to a spa, get a mani-pedi, and just totally relax that day.

Then, for my dog, I'll take her to my favorite groomer and buy her treats! When you say "love" and Valentine's Day, it doesn't mean it's only for couples. Self-love is very important as well. When you're truly happy and contented, everything else follows.

Tip #2: Spend time with family

Ched, 55, FinTech commercial director/entrepreneur/photographer

I will be celebrating Valentine’s day twice this year! The first will be celebrating Valentine’s day with the Lord at mass during my lunch break. Then, after work, I am going home to spend some time with my two lovely grandchildren: Dustin, who’s three, and and Davi, who is 7 months old. I’m hoping that their parents go out on a date so they will be all mine! If that happens, it will definitely be a Chickenjoy dinner (which Dustin loves), then a Batman movie. As a certified Glamma, there’s nothing quite like celebrating love with those who know and love you most: your family.

Liz C., 36, author and illustrator at @arttofeedtheheart/multitasking staff member at @favor.church

I like spending Valentine's Day with my loved ones. I enjoy spending time with my nephews the most, so I'll probably take my three-year-old nephew out on a date!

Tip #3: Celebrate friendship

Danah, 27, public speaker/author/plus size model/makeup artist/co-founder of the SELF-LOVE CLUB
I plan to spend Valentine's celebrating with the Author of Love Himself - the true Lover of my soul, God. I know I lack no good thing because I have a deep, personal relationship with Jesus.

Singlehood is such a beautiful, beautiful gift! We must maximize it!

Of course, I also plan to celebrate it with my gals, making it a GALentine’s day! I am the kind of woman I am today because of the soul sisters God has blessed me with. They have inspired me and kept me going. It’s most probably going be spent talking about theology, our progress in womanhood, our dislike of rom-coms (they’re emotional porn!), and our goals for growth - all done with the comfort of good food and warm cuddles!

(Editor's note: February 13 was actually Danah's birthday! We hope you had an awesome celebration, Danah!)

Karen, 34, PR head

Valentines is a day of love not just for couples but, for the people who’s been there for you through your ups and downs, tantrums and all. Like always, I spend my Valentine’s with my closest friends and family whom I hold dear. I may be single but I am happy because I’ve got the right bunch of people to help me get through this life.

Nike, 29, senior copywriter/entrepreneur/photographer

This Valentines’ Day, I plan to participate in an outreach program with my colleagues, create new stories to tell online, see Black Panther, and cap off the night with a trip to Hyrule. (In layman’s terms, continue where I left off at The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild on the Nintendo Switch)

Tip #4: Feed your soul

Jas, 22, call center agent/Conservatory of Music student at UST

I plan to celebrate love at home this Valentine's day by studying for my upcoming solfeggio (sight-singing/sight-reading) recitation. Rather than participating with social convention, I choose to be productive on my own!

Kristin, 26, photographer/copywriter/social media specialist

Aside from the daily grind (since Valentine's falls on a weekday), I plan to love myself in the best way possible - working out, and then watching a good movie afterwards.

As a formerly inactive couch-body, one thing that I never saw myself doing was starting a healthy diet, paired with exercise. We have to remember, exercising should never be for vanity’s sake: it’s for your health, it’s to help invest in a body that’s yours, and yours alone. We only have one body, and it’s our responsibility to make sure we take care of it in the best way possible. I mean, how can we expect someone to take care of us if we can’t show ourselves the same tender loving care?

Some of you may be thinking, “How cliche, a movie?”, but you know, sometimes, after a tiring 9-5, all you want to do is sit back, relax, and appreciate a good movie. You don’t need a plus one to get full on a film. Movies come in all shapes and forms, so the choices are almost limitless! They can uplift, make us cry, empower, and even tech us a thing or two. Also, it’s a great way to entertain ourselves!

Just remember, take care of yourself, physically, emotionally, and mentally - because at the end of the day, you’re in your hands.

Karess, 32, social media specialist

February 14 happens to be the show date of “Black Panther” in the Philippines. As a gag, I thought of watching it on opening day with an equally single friend.

On Valentine’s Day, I’m pretty much looking forward to having fun by geeking out. Just cos I’m single doesn’t mean I’m going to be moping about. It’s a time of self-discovery and learning more about yourself - what you like, don’t like, and cannot live without. I’m not just going to sit around and wait for Prince Charming to sweep me off my feet - it’s a time for me to enjoy this season to the fullest.

Queen, 29, photographer/makeup artist/social media specialist

Valentines doesn’t have to be complicated. Take time for yourself, unwind, and immerse yourself to what ignites your passion. Sometimes, even good ol' artist block can also be a tool to rekindle your artistic passion.

Watch a film you’ve been planning to see for the longest time and just really “feel” it. Discover artists and just “breathe” their work. Let them inspire you to push and do something extra cause why not.

For this Valentines Day, I suggest you do everything extremely extra. Who cares if people judge you for it! It’s the perfect day to answer “just cause” and it’s completely fine.

So this is me. I'm 24 and adding another year in my unbroken streak of Valentine-less V-days. Honestly, I used to dread the holiday, used to wallow in bitter loneliness as I watched friends, classmates, and later officemates receive flowers, chocolates, even harana from people they were “in love” with. But, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned that flowers, chocolates, song dedications, and stuffed toys aren’t the only expressions of love that matter.

Instead, like these women, I’ve learned to see Valentines as a day to celebrate not only the giddy glee of kilig or the rose-colored realm of romance, but also the joy of friendship, the tenderness of family, and, perhaps most importantly, the head-over-heels rush of falling in love, every day, with yourself.

While I won’t pretend to completely love or even like who I am, I see Valentine's Day as a good time to remind yourself that before you can love or fall in love with anyone else, you have to start with you. With being comfortable with who, and where, you are.

So here I am, single. Maybe just like you. Maybe not. Either way, this Valentine's Day, I plan to enjoy the moment that I occupy, and the person I occupy it as: a crazy, beauty-loving, music-making, noisy introvert who maybe hasn’t experienced romance yet, but is, hopefully, on the way to learning how to love.

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

Header image courtesy of Gen-zel Habab

Frankie Torres

Frankie is a marketing strategist by day, a musician by night, and a blogger in the betweens. You can find more of her writing at A Roaming Tsinay.

https://actuallyfrankie.wordpress.com/
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